In my almost two years in college, I have realized that there is a specific culture that greets you the day you step foot on your campus. You may not notice it right away, but it exists. And on my campus, there exists what I like to call a "culture of conformity." This implicit culture preaches that uniformity, conformity is the only state of being on campus. There is no middle ground; it is either you join one of the many or live on the outskirts of the campus community.
On my campus, there is this pervasive idea that once you begin your time here, you are expected to go out every weekend, drink until you pass out, and then brag about it to all of your friends. You are also expected to not care too much about your grades, not participate in class, and generally be uninterested in all of your classes. There is also this inherent idea that being rude and catty is an acceptable means of treating others, either to their faces or behind their backs.
Where did this culture come from? My theory is that sometime long before those my age started as students here, there was a major shift, a schism of sorts. I imagine there being two sets of people: those who went to class, participated in various clubs and activities on campus, and generally had a good time versus those who decided that they needed alcohol to have fun, that being a good student was nerdy, and being a generally kind person was being was too humane. Once the latter started to announce how much fun they were having to anyone and everyone who would listen, more and more people decided this was the 'correct' thing to do. And as the years passed, those who were once students of this new culture then taught it to the newcomers, thus establishing this now normative culture on campus.
Now here we are in 2015, and this culture is the only culture present on campus. Or so it seems. There is still a small population of people, like myself, that do not bend to the standards of this culture. But this is no easy task, for if you don't submit yourself to the powers that be, you are judged as 'weird' and 'abnormal.' No matter how many things you are involved in on campus, if you resist the culture, you are an outsider; you are an 'other.'
For me, deciding not to conform was my own decision; I have never been one to bend to the wishes of other people. And honestly, I have no desire to just be "one of many" when I can be distinctly, uniquely me. By not conforming, I am holding true to my own values; however, because of this, I am an 'other.' I am looked at differently, I am treated differently, and I feel differently than everyone else here. This 'othered' feeling I get tells me that because I don't follow the established norms on this campus, the campus culture is telling me that I am wrong for doing what is right for me.
What makes me feel worse is wondering how many people have felt this 'othering' and could not combat it; how many came into college expecting to continue being true to themselves and their values, and then felt this stigma of abnormality, and as a result, traded their standards for some friends and a couple of drinks?
One of the first lessons we ever learned in school as small children are to respect each others' differences. How this simple lesson has been lost among a group of educated adults is baffling to me. The culture on this campus and other campuses like mine across America needs to change. It doesn't need to be dissolved completely; the culture needs to be expanded to allow for the mutual respect of all groups, conformists and non-conformists alike.
It's time for a change, and there is no time like the present to break this culture of conformity.
-That University Girl
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